Few experiences can rival the disappointment of finding that ideal someone
only to discover that their personality or relationship situation is flawed
beyond repair. It's worse than spending hours over the hot stove and then
burning that perfect dinner. It is a travesty, but since it happens all the
time, you must deal with it.

Denial is a common reaction. Many people dismiss warning signs and continue to indulge their fantasies of a great future in couplehood.

You need to take serious consideration of your first instinct. Why was your
meeting hid in secrecy? If he is involved with someone else, no matter what
you're attraction is, it will not workout without disappointment and
heartbreak. Even if he did leave his present girlfriend for you, how do you
know he won't cheat on you and leave you for the next? Even while you're
together, you'll always wonder if he is yours and yours only.

You need to do your homework. Ask him to do things on the spur of the
moment. Ask him if you can call him in the middle of the night if you're
thinking about him. If you get the runaround on these answers, then you need
to move on to someone who is more deserving of your desire.

"I've only been out with a certain girl on three dates and her birthday is next week. What should I do for her birthday to show her I care without going overboard?"                                                           - Derrick, Florida

Birthdays can be a difficult time for those of us who live in mortal fear of the aging process. But what many don't realize is that birthdays take just as great a toll on the birthday girl's or boy's love interest. Most people in new relationships feel as if they're on trial and awaiting judgment when giving a gift. 

Picking the perfect present would be a whole lot easier if you consider the most important determining factor which is relationship duration. The amount of time the two of you have spent together should have a direct impact on the two variables of creativity and cost.

After just three or four dates, the general rule is to acknowledge the occasion without going overboard. Spending hundreds of dollars on someone you're just getting to know is definitely no solution. After you've shared a few dates, a humble token of you affection will suffice to say that you cared enough to give something. I would suggest flowers at work or some music CDs that she's been wanting.

Page 1 of 5      Next